Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Dogs, Girls, Work

So, here I sit again. Late into the night, unable to sleep. Wading through the ocean of thoughts that consume my mind. So much has been happening these last couple of weeks. We got a new dog, which is cool. He's a pretty mellow dog, which works well for our family. He's been sleeping in my room, which is different for me, but also cool. I met this great girl that I really like. She's interesting and funny and smart and beautiful. We'll just say that I'm cautiously optimistic. My oldest sister moved in with us, she's planning on taking over the business, which brings up a whole new set of problems. Our main client is dropping us, pretty much without warning, we just found out last week. So the business is basically shot, so there's not much for her to take over. This makes me especially upset because it means that in the near future I'm going to have to figure something out to make money. It also bothers me that this whole idea of owning a business was supposedly for "my future." Well if it was supposed to be for my future then why was I not consulted when my Mom and Grandma decided to buy this business. Then when I raised my concerns it changed from being about my future to being "something to do for a couple years until we figure something else out." Now the latest thing is "you need to go out and get a job." and "either go to school or start paying rent." Well it's kind of hard to go to school when I don't have any money to pay for it and god knows my parents never thought that far ahead. My Mom doesn't seem to understand that not everyone can just go out and get a job as easily as her. She's worked in the mortgage business her whole life, all she has to do is apply for a job and it's hers. It's a little harder when the only thing you can do is fix computers and don't have enough experience for anyone to hire you. Not to mention that fixing computers doesn't exactly pay the big bucks. With gas prices and everything else being so expensive $8/hr doesn't really cut it anymore. What I really want to do is own my own record store, I think that would be something that I could enjoy, but it takes money to start something like that. Seeing as the money that my Grandma spent on the business is never coming back I'm basically screwed. So pretty much life is the way it has always been for me, nothing is for sure, everything is up in the air. I imagine the coming months will be very frustrating and challenging, now all that's left is to see if I'm up for that challenge.

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