Thursday, July 19, 2007
I've been doing a lot of searching lately, I search my mind for the answers to the questions that bother me. Somehow I never seem to find the answers I'm looking for. I suppose that's the mystery to life though, If I knew all the answers then there wouldn't be any questions to ask. In my searching I dredge up memories of far away places and people, from better times. Those who know me know well enough that I'm not very good at making contact with people. I'm not exactly sure what keeps me from just picking up the phone and calling. I guess it was easier back in High School when we all had something in common, but now everything is so different for everyone. Ever since Jenna was killed I have felt terrible about not contacting the people that should matter to me most. I want to talk to old friends but whatever it is that keeps me from doing so still applies no matter how much I want to reach out. Certain memories come into focus more often than others, as if they have a mind of their own and want to haunt me.